Calgary to Las Vegas – Air Canada

Air Canada flight AC546 was, at the time of booking, to be Airbus A320-operated and two Business Class seats showed available for Star Alliance redemption. Using the bmi British Midland 'cash and miles' system, these were snapped up for 11,250 miles and £75 plus tax each, with the third seat required being cash purchased to earn at least some of those miles back. Air Canada’s website is clear and straight forward, with fares presented under differing names rather than just cabin service classes. The Las Vegas flight was to operate two-cabin, with Business Class service being the newly refitted Executive Class. This gives wider seating, greater recline and Maple Leaf lounge access amongst other benefits.

A couple of weeks after booking however, the flight had been downgraded to an Embraer E190 and further idle searching showed no redemption seats being offered on other flights now using the smaller aircraft. We were very lucky to have got in when we did. A slight timing change flagged up the equipment change, which was notified by email immediately from AC with reference to the paid-for booking. To this day we await the booking confirmation or schedule change notification from bmi. The earlier seat selections were knocked out with this change but were swiftly reset with a call to Air Canada in London – taking all three seats of row one.

Check-in at Calgary was very quick, even though we'd not completed the formalities on-line in advance. Seat selections had been maintained however and I looked forward to my first ever Air Canada flight. The check-in agent advised that US Immigration pre-clearance was on site at Calgary and we were directed towards it. She was unable to provide I-94W Visa Waiver forms however and said we could sort this at the US desks. Baggage check is post-immigration, so with our cases still in tow, we lumbered off.

I hate US immigration.

The tensa-barrier queue snaked around, but moved reasonably swiftly. Eventually, we were called to a desk, whereupon we had our passports examined. The official did not trouble himself to disguise his heartfelt pain at being presented with non US/Canadian documents and, with much harrumphing, rummaged about for I-94Ws. He broke into a new pack, thrust them at us and told us that we should have filled them in already. Ahem. He sent us off to a naughty desk, telling us to walk back to the front of the queue to be recalled, and we quickly filled them. Back at the front of the queue, a different official called us. In the hurry, we’d all forgotten to fill in that bit of the form underneath where it says ‘For Government Use Only’. Amazing how, when under pressure, one follows instructions even more closely, even when experience tells you that the instruction is wrong. So, we get sent away with thinly veiled venom again – trudging to the naughty desk with our cases once more for the three seconds it takes to fill in a flight number and then wait to be called again. Officious fool.

We finally make it through and the longed-for relief of the Maple Leaf Lounge and Air Canada hospitality. No darts. There is no Maple Leaf Lounge in the pre-cleared area of Calgary, despite all the airline website’s sales patter, promises and justifications of the Business Class fare. Very poor.

The inbound aircraft is running 30 minutes late, so we linger with the proletariat until we are finally called, all of about 2 minutes after the crew have boarded. Clearly the ground staff want shot of us, although special assistance, status and premium pax are at least called first. Which, as it’s North America, means that everyone, apart from the Ukranian who didn’t understand the announcement, stands up and surges forward.

At the door of the aircraft, we shock the still-unpacking crew and I hold back the increasing force of high-rolling fortune-seekers behind until the chief steward has fixed his hairpiece and cleared the cabin for boarding.

The aircraft decor is fresh, new and pleasantly fitted and the seats rapidly fill. There are three rows of Executive seating, arranged 1L 2R and then a kink in the aisle to centralise it between 2-2 Economy Class seating. Executive seats are proper non-convertibles, with decent recline and a curtain separates the forward cabin from the veal at the rear. There are seat back (or bulkhead) screens and On Demand Audion and Video, even on this basic bird. A pre-departure drink is hurriedly offered – orange, water, a beer if asked nicely.

Doors are closed and pushback is as swift as could be hoped for, and we commence a short taxi before take off at just after 8pm.

So, so far, immigration has been a joke, we’re feeling a bit short-changed by the lack of lounge and less than impressed by sloppy boarding. Still, the seat is comfy and there is a spectacular sunset above the clouds. Roll on great Canadian service.

And roll off. The entertainment system is inoperative. The seatbelt sign is off, but the cabin divider curtain curtain remains open and Economy passengers fill the Business Class aisle queuing for the loo. The curtain to the galley is drawn however, to ensure that the full-of-bladder wait in the cabin, not at the trap door. The pale bluey-green curtain is filthy with the stains of the previous hundred sectors.

There is a choice of salmon or chicken salad, on the same ‘base’. Remarkably, given the cheapness of the ingredients, it is presented in a china receptacle. Which is chipped. And sadly it seems as if the caterers have used at least as much aviation fuel as has been wasted on flying the weight of the china pots as a quite unique alternative to vinaigrette. The beer does little to overpower it. The quantity of the food can’t be faulted, but the quality certainly can. It is, quite honestly, rotten, and anyone who has the temerity to complain about British Airways Club Europe food should be beaten with an Air Canada salmon fillet. Now I know what happens to the stuff that John West rejects.

The entertainment system eventually gets booted into some sort of action, but never really settles during the two and a half hour flight to Sin City. I spend most of the flight with Gloria Gaynor stuck in a loop (interspersed occasionally by Dame Burly Chassis asking if she could touch me here), while the participants of various bachelor parties scratch their crotches in the aisle next to me prior to pebble-dashing the reverse side of the bulkhead in front. And all for a bargain £360 one-way.

At least the crew are friendly, even if they do seem rather dejected at the abysmal level of service they are cost-controlled to deliver. Hairpiece Harry chats happily with MCC and FCC on approach to Las Vegas, as Gloria continues to wail that she is what she is, she is, is she, she is. Ad nauseum.

The pain is eased by a smooth landing, a short taxi and then a not too lengthy walk to the baggage hall. The driver from CLS Limos is waiting for us and the bags pop out surprisingly quickly given previous tedious experiences at McCarran Airport.

Final verdict for Air Canada: a disappointingly low 5/10. No-one was physically injured, I guess, but the bmi Diamond Club Miles credit for the paid-for Business Class ticket was stingy too at just 1039.

Las Vegas, Nevada – Part One

Now, dear reader, if you have made it this far and have read all preceding reports in chronological order, then you will have been peering at your screen for very nearly the same length of time as it would have taken you to undertake the trip yourself. For this I apologise, but I fear that you should also apologise even more to your boss, as you’ve probably been doing it on company time.

So, if you started at the first post and read the full list of Trip Reports, you’ll have been expecting this trip to Las Vegas. Which is more than two out of three participants in the actual trip were. You see this was all a surprise in recognition of MCCs 60th and FCCs 65th birthdays this year. The news was broken in the US Immigration queue at Calgary. MCC looked a bit excited. FCC looked as if his wisdom teeth were giving him gyp. A former member of the communist party, he has matured towards geriatry as all ardent socialists do – by veering from thinking that Stalinism was a bit wishy-washy to ending up politically-aligned slightly to the right of Genghis Khan. En route, of course, they pick up little of the charm of either extremism and therefore hedonism remains their constant foe. Viva Las Vegas. Hehe.

Purely for the purposes of badness and to ensure that his discomfort began immediately, I had booked a superstretch for the short whisk to the Four Seasons. Rolling around on the back seat like an egg in an earthquake, under the fibre optics and booming Bose, he was clearly not enjoying himself. His pain being made much the more excruciating by the fact that MCC thought the whole thing hilarious. Me too. I was still laughing when we slumped out at the Four Seasons and, leaving them to variously glower and titter on a sofa, I checked in.

I soon stopped laughing. The receptionist was sweetness itself, tapping the keyboard as she stood next to her superior. She described the beautiful room we had booked, confirming everything that I knew from my pre-trip research. I have long since learnt that you should never book anything that you know will not meet your expectations, resting all your hopes solely and potentially vainly on an upgrade. Book what you want; anything better is a bonus.

But now she tells me about this wonderful suite upgrade that I can have, which is of course excellent as the American Express Fine Hotels & Resorts rate includes a subject to availability upgrade. And she can do this for just $150 a night. Definitely no laughter here. I manage a smile to point out the Ts&Cs of the AMEX rate. Either there’s an upgrade available or there’s not. If there isn’t, I’m happy with what I’ve got. If there is, then comp. it as part of the rate, an example of great Four Seasons service and my first taste of the hotel and the company. She looks at the superior nervously.

The supervisor stares intently at her screen, ignoring the conversation. I press the receptionist on the policy, but she says that it’s too big an upgrade to comp. For fun now, I offer half. No can do. She completes the check-in and walks us to the lift. She wishes MCC a happy birthday just past and, out of earshot of the superior, apologises profusely for the upgrade scam. ‘I’d have given it to you,’ she said, ‘but y’know......’

Apart from the really poor first impression, the particularly daft thing was that, when we got to our room, there was a lovely Birthday Cake waiting for MCC. Which, of course (unless there were two?) wouldn’t have been in the suite we were nearly nickel and dimed into.

I’ve since spoken to a charming Manager from the Four Seasons, who called me in response to their post-stay online survey and he’s promised to look into the policy and the way it’s communicated. I hope they do review it, or others will I am sure feel as I did. In these difficult economic times, impacting nowhere more than Las Vegas, the Four Seasons missed a real opportunity to impress and encourage loyalty there.

Back to the room however, on the quiet (non-airport side) of the hotel and with a fantastic full-length strip view. The Four Seasons occupies the uppermost floors of the Mandalay Bay resort and our foreground view is of Luxor’s pyramid, with the Stratosphere twinkling in the distance.

Yet another hotel unable to service a room booked for three guests with amenities of similar multiples, however with a quick call to housekeeping to acquire an extra coffee mug, the Geriatric Meerkats and this Passepartout sit, with the lights off, eating birthday cake and gazing at the neon, and trying to reconcile having woken up in Banff that morning.

The room itself is generous in proportion and expensively (if a little sparsely) furnished. There are two doubles, a large side board, plasma, coffee maker, desk, coffee table and easy chair. The wardrobe space is not overly large however (something I’ve previously thought to be an issue at The Wynn, too). The bathroom is marble, large and well lit, with a separate room for the loo, an over-sized bath and glass shower cubicle.

Things perk up immeasurably in the morning. Despite the AMEX FHR package including ‘continental’ breakfast, confirmed verbatim by the embarrassed receptionist of the previous evening, no such thing exists on the menu. Beaten and cowed, but seated in wonderfully comfortable chairs at a spacious table on the poolside outdoor terrace, welcomed warmly by greeter and serving staff and surrounded by lush planting, we are in no mood to query further.

Uniquely on this trip, there is no breakfast buffet, so we order a la carte from an extensive menu. The service, food and environment is just lovely and it sets us up royally for the day ahead. Even FCC looks like he might be starting to lighten up, although I suspect that he is still considering what General Pinochet would do in a similar situation.

Given that trip reports abound on the many diversions and distractions which this most iconic of cities can offer, there seems little point in merely repeating them.

Suffice to say that it’s an expedition of several hours in length to cover merely the principal sights of The Strip, accelerated slightly at beginning an end by the Mandalay/Luxor/Excalibur tram and the Las Vegas Monorail respectively. There's nowhere like it on Earth; not even the places it's meant to replicate.

A little unhelpfully, the Monorail does not hug Las Vegas Boulevard as it heads back South, runnng several blocks East of The Strip in line with the Las Vegas Convention Centre and Hilton rather than hotels like the Venetian, The Mirage, TI or The Wynn. It snakes West to the Strip further South by Harrah’s. That said, there is a free shuttle from The Wynn to the Convention Centre Monorail Station, which drops and collects from The Wynn’s Tower Suites entrance on Sands Avenue. The monorail takes you South to the MGM, from whose station a walk through the gaming floor, out of the main entrance, across the road and into The Excalibur takes you to the free tram back down to Luxor and Mandalay Bay for the Four Seasons.

Helped by the 96 degree June heat, FCC appears to be thawing as the time to freshen-up for the evening ahead arrives. It actually sounds like he might have been quite impressed by curved escalators and painted ceilings in malls that can fool you momentarily into thinking you are indeed outdoors. He’s even chatting about the (now relatively antique) animatronic show in Caesar’s Forum and the indoor gardens at the Bellagio and The Wynn.

Result.

Las Vegas Part Two – Daniel Boulud and Le Reve

Scrubbed and smartened, a cab takes us behind The Strip to avoid the teatime traffic and drops us at The Wynn again in time for our dinner reservation at Daniel Boulud’s eponymous brasserie. The reservation is the earliest available, to give us time to make our later theatre performance.

There seem to be a lot of management-looking types milling around as we approach the desk and, when I go to present ourselves, I first have to step out of the path of a passing sniffer dog. The table, it transpires, is not quite ready so, taking a risk leaving them alone in a strange country, I tell the Meerkats to sit and stay and head off to the Box Office to pick up our tickets for Le Reve, one of The Wynn’s two shows. One less job for later. When I return, I feel sure that they will have been seated but, no, 10 minutes after the booked time, they are still standing.

I go to the desk and ask what’s going on. Cue much dashing about, the arrival of a Maitre d’, profuse apology and a welcome to us all. He offers us a table indoors or out; we opt for indoors and he seats us with a clear view of the Lake of Dreams. En route, he explains the delay. The President of Chile is in the adjacent private dining room and the security arrangements have been slightly more intrusive than they had hoped. Our own Pinochet looks slightly uncomfortable as he tries to remember whether the current postholder is friend or foe.

We are then fussed over and generally treated exceptionally well by the entire staff, who subtly and comfortingly acknowledge that we have to be seated for a show later, are already running a little late and do everything they can to make us as relaxed as possible. As a veggie, MCC asks the server if Chef can offer anything to augment the menu which, though otherwise extensive, is not particularly well-populated with meat-free options. The server describes today’s Chef’s vegetarian creation and MCC signs up. FCC orders the famous db Burger, while CC here plumps for the Tenderloin.

With our tickets on the table, we are kept informed of progress in the kitchen as drinks are refreshed, bread basket replenished and the restaurant fills up. When it arrives, the food is nouvelle in US terms, but for us Brits it remains hearty in proportion, is beautifully presented, professionally served and, most importantly of course, tastes wonderful.

We have coffee before heading to the theatre, with the staff offering us the option, if we wish, to return after the show for dessert. A nice touch and one which is a good sales strategy for them too, I would think.

Le Reve is the creative work of one Francois Dragone, formerly of Cirque du Soleil and, more recently, feted as the man behind Celine Dion’s A New Day show in Vegas. The theatre is specially built, in the round, and most notable for its stage which rises and falls from a huge water tank. As ‘curtain up’ approaches, it’s obvious however that the theatre is not particularly full. I have booked the VIP Package, which includes a half bottle of Perrier-Jouet champagne per person, special seating and chocolate-dipped strawberries. These seats constitute the back row of the theatre, forming a circle above and around all the standard seats. The lowest, front seats are classified as Splash Zone. Ours, meanwhile, are of almost Lay-Z-Boy proportions and each pair is separated by a coffee table. Upon each of these is a plate of four large strawberries per person, and champagne flutes. A server is assigned, greets, pours the first glass and then keeps the bottle on ice.

The show is stunning, in an admittedly very generic way. There are no celebrities, no stars, no well-known music, just an acrobatic performance of consummate skill, choreographed and lit superbly, with great sound. The stage moves in and out of the water, with the performers regularly falling into the water, swimming, diving, jumping and then being held submerged while they are fed oxygen by scuba divers out-of-sight below the surface. VIP guests can see some of this underwater action on monitors set into the low wall in front of their seats. The water makes the impossibility of some of the moves and holds performed by the acrobats even more incredible.

Speaking of incredible, here’s a thing. Every time I put my drained champagne glass down, I could see, from the corner of my eye, the neck of the bottle swooping down to refill it. Maximum setting down to pour time: 6 seconds. Impressive. I did start to feel very relaxed and, through a fug of fizz, began to consider the possibility that I may have had slightly more than half a bottle. Perhaps the meerkats were not quaffing so quickly? I resolve to observe. FCC is not downing it, but MCC is certainly taking advantage. The pouring continues unabated. The show ends and our server asks us if we would like the rest of the champagne ‘to go’. So, expecting a few remaining drops in a stoppered bottle, I say ‘amen’ to that and wait a moment. She arrives back with three Wynn-branded plastic oversized tumblers and shares the contents of what must have been near-enough a full bottle between them.

God bless America!

We head out into the casino with our buckets of fizz sloshing, feeling quite the lushes and veering slightly. Dulled by the booze, FCC puts up no fight when forced to sit at a slot machine, and I ceremonially present a single dollar bill. He plays it and emerges triumphant with a 60% return. MCC is less successful with hers, recording a mere 2% upswing. Expecting them to keep their winners’ slips as souvenirs, I move to leave but no, they wish to cash their chips. Meerkats. Who’d have ‘em?

We cab it back to the calm serenity of the Four Seasons in preparation for an early start the following morning. I try to convince Pinochet that if he’d dropped a mill, he’d be sitting on another 600K now, but he’s having none of it. He is looking forward to his turndown chocolate though. And hiccoughing fizz quite a lot.

Las Vegas Part Three – The Grand Canyon

The variously manifested effects of the previous evening’s champagne consumption do not lend themselves to a sprightly hop from bed at 5.30am. There’s little choice in the matter however, as the ODS limo will be drawing up at 6.00am. The fact that it’s a little late is a useful problem, as it affords the opportunity to down another bucket full of coffee from the Four Seasons’ lobby breakfast-on-the-run presentation.

The dulled senses also help in MCC being able to avoid dwelling on the mounting fear of her first ever helicopter ride. Keeping her calm enough to go through with it being the reason why I’d passed on the seaplane opps in Vancouver; if that had been bumpy, she’s have bailed out of this flight for sure.



With the sun already ascended quite appreciably, it’s a short ride to Sundance Helicopters purpose-built facility on The Strip side of McCarran Airport. We are weighed in and have to stump up the ubiquitous fuel surcharge ($30pp) and have a dandy Avery label with a number written on it attached to our left breasts. Quite the Far Eastern tour group members we look. We are given a pre-flight information card and encouraged to watch the safety video playing on the plasma.



At 7am, our pilot calls our number, which constitutes the lottery draw of who we’ll be sharing the chopper with. As it turns out, it’s a friendly couple from Surrey who will be with us for most of the trip to the Canyon but, as they have booked a slightly different package, they’ll be being dropped off before we finally return to Las Vegas.

Our itinerary is booked through Viator, goes under the title ‘The Grand Canyon All American Helicopter Tour’ and is a useful 25% less than it was last year (in dollar terms) and then a bit more thanks to the strength of sterling. Quite why that still requires a fuel surcharge defeats me slightly, but ours is not to question. There’s a further 5% discount to be had by chucking ‘codesUK’ into the promotional box at checkout.

Belt pouches containing lifejackets are donned and we make our way out to the 6 seat Eurocopter Astar for a final briefing. Strapped in, headsets on and a smile and wave for the onboard camera and the rotor is being spooled up for a 6 foot hover and then careful edge forward off the H-plate and toward the taxiway. The pilot pivots the machine through 90 clockwise degrees and then we tip slightly for the Airwolf-esque take-off roll and soaring rise away from the blacktop.



This is the moment of truth as far as the less-than-confident MCC is concerned but, so far so good, as we bank East across the Southern perimeter of the airfield and set a heading for Henderson City. The sun is now kicking out some serious heat, but the aircon copes well given the greenhouse bubble of the cabin.

The Sundance product includes a continuous commentary, which can be turned down via the headphone volume controls and which consists of both spoken word and quite well-matched music. This is augmented by topical interjections from the pilot.



The first sight of note is the Hoover Dam, and the chopper takes an s-shaped route to offer good views of both sides of the dam and from both sides of the cabin. It’s then onward, passing the spurs and bluffs, mesas and buttes that line Lake Mead, before crossing the massive body of water and heading towards the Canyon itself.

Cresting over the ridges of the surrounding highlands, the flightpath leads towards the Western gateway (or outlet, depending on your point-of-view) of the Canyon and the first glimpses of the vertiginous walls. With the theme to Indiana Jones playing over the PA, the Canyon looms and then the ground plummets away beneath the glazed footwells.



The Native American Hualapai community have recently opened a visitor attraction which is clearly visible as the Sundance helicopter begins its run along the canyon. The Grand Canyon Skywalk is the subject of much publicity and comment, and consists of a visitor centre and cantilevered glass platform which forms a u-shaped projection from the Canyon lip.

The promotional narrative informs readers that the Skywalk is 4000 feet above the Colorado River, which is absolutely correct. However, the Canyon wall beneath is far from vertical and, in fact, the projection is over a sort of side creek, rather than the main trench itself.

Visitors to the Skywalk have commented extensively on sites such as TripAdvisor, not just on the physical situation of the attraction, but also the commercial proposition which obliges visitors to pay for a tour to reach it, before paying once again to access the glass, upon which photography is banned....

Many of the comments posted are easily understood when the Skywalk is swept past by the chopper.



The Sundance tour then takes passengers down to a landing site inside the Canyon. This gives the opportunity to really get a good impression of the scale of the geography and geology of this slash along the earth’s crust. The peace and quiet is tangible and there’s plenty of time to take a wander through the scrub to find some solitude and take in the 360 degree view.



The landing site is some way above the river and there are a couple of camouflage – draped picnic shelters nearby, upon which your pilot will serve a light breakfast of orange juice, pastries, and a glass of something (!) fizzy. It’s all rather civilised and, of course, the benefit of sharing the helicopter with others means that there are plenty of willing photographers to take snaps of your party in its entirety.



After about half an hour, as the Canyon gradually warms in the new day, it’s time to re-board the helicopter and soar back towards the rim to return from this pristine wilderness to the complete opposite that is Vegas.

On a previous trip, we made a more-or-less direct heading back to McCarran but, on this occasion we were to detour via Boulder City Airport to deposit our fellow tourists for the start of a rafting adventure. This extended our trip slightly (a bonus if you like helicopters!) and afforded us an extra landing and take-off, which as with most air travel is much the most interesting part for me. We also got a bit of a Top Gun walk across the tarmac....



This partial unloading also means that, for the final 20 minutes, we have the cabin to ourselves. We now aim straight for the Northern end of The Strip and, as the hotels and sights come into sharp focus, the inevitable soundtrack is Elvis and Viva Las Vegas.



Our flight path takes us to the right of The Stratosphere before banking 90 degrees to the left and buzzing the length of The Strip as far as New York New York. Here, we make another 90 degree turn to get a superb view of the Statue of Liberty and the Eiffel Tower opposite.



A final 90 degree swing, this time to the right, and we are on a steep approach back to the Sundance Heliport.



It’s a concentrated immersion into the natural wonders of the Nevada/Arizona border, and quite difficult to reconcile that, by 10.30am, we are back at the Four Seasons having had breakfast in the Canyon. It’s a once in a lifetime experience that I’ve now done twice.

And so ends our brief side-tour to Las Vegas, as we pack our cases once again and I prepare for the now habitual checkout tussle. I’m not to be disappointed as that breakfast credit comes back to haunt us. It seems that there is a fixed amount apportioned to the included ‘Continental Breakfast’ that they don’t actually serve and no amount of discussion, or highlighting of the fact that we have not availed ourselves of the one-time per stay lunch credit seems to have any impact. It’s another point to be discussed with the charming manager who calls some weeks later, but who knows whether processes will be improved for other guests. It’s certainly not been as slick an experience as I’d expected of a Four Seasons property.

Defeated, we check out and take a cab to McCarran for our US Airways flight 16 to Phoenix Sky Harbor.

Las Vegas to Phoenix – US Airways

The Airbus A320-operated US Airways flight from Las Vegas to Phoenix is scheduled to take just over an hour and, invariably, is over with in less. This makes the differential between Coach and First at the booking stage frankly ridiculous. Coach prices at $69 plus tax (including seat pre-selection); First at $423 however, like many North American carriers, upgrades are available at the gate. They are also available at On Line Check In for $50, so it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to work out the strategy here (or to understand the completely goosed business model). The one snag with the 24-hour before take-off On Line Check In upgrade is that the website does not accept non-US credit cards for this particular process. A quick phone call is required and it’s a simple and efficient job. We don't have the pick of seats, so end up slightly separated, but at least FCC and MCC are together in row 4. I'm in 3A. Print Your Own Boarding Pass works flawlessly and bag drop at Las Vegas is very efficient.

Upgraded Coach to First seats like these do not attract a bonus for Frequent Flyer Programme point accrual, and there is no lounge access. The Priority Pass lounge happens to be the US Airways Club however and is to be found landside, just to the right of security, next to the Airport Job Centre and through a very unprepossessing door.

There is free WiFi throughout the airport, and the friendly lounge dragons will also make announcements. It’s hardly a spacious facility but it’s separated into two areas, there’s a TV, the airport’s wifi (no PCs) telephones, free tea, coffee, soft drinks and snacks, and a cash bar. To be honest, it’s perfectly serviceable as long as you’re not in for a long delay. Re-entry is easy if you want to wander the shops or have a last poke on a slot.

First, Business and Fast Track security occupies the lane closest to the lounge and is reasonably swift. Beware however that this lane also handles special assistance pax and the staff lane is also controlled by the same security team. This can lead to the odd delay, but nothing to speak of and you should be on your way in no time. The walk to the gate is only a few minutes too, with more shops and slots on the way.

Boarding is announced by assistance, class, status and then row number. Frankly, it’s still a scrum.

The flight itself can be described thus: Filthy, Take Off, Uncomfortable, Land.

Seats are ‘proper’ non-convertibles, leather faced (although I would not have liked to see the state of the cattle when they were alive) and absolutely knackered. Service is a free drink from the bar and a grimace. Oh and a bag of crisps. The best thing to be said about the whole experience is that (having come back for more of this several times) the pilot appears to be in charge and the structural components of the aircraft remain attached in the right sequence for the duration of the ordeal. I mean flight.

It gets much better when we hit terra firma however. Touch down to baggage being on the belt is in 17 minutes. That includes taxiing and the not exactly short walk to the carousels. I love Phoenix. It gets better as it’s then just a short walk into the desert heat to the Car Rental Centre Shuttle pick up point.

This offsite Centre is a fairly recent development, representing all the major chains and with full premium services for frequent renters etc. The whole system seems to still be filled with enthusiasm. Woe betide a passenger who tries to lug their baggage on board – that’s what the driver is there for. He (or she) is porter, driver and guide all rolled into one and it’s a great example of making a superb first impression on visitors. Top marks.

Final verdict for US Airways however: an unexpectedly generous 3/10. Dignity was dented and personal hygiene compromised, but they got us and the bags to where we needed to be. Without the 600 Diamond Club miles it would have been a lowly 2/10. No pictures of this flight, as I didn't want to get the camera dirty.

Phoenix, Arizona – Part One

If any city is going to struggle with the stratospheric rise in the price of oil, it’s going to be Phoenix. The Arizonan capital is the epitomy of the American Dream of limitless expansion driven by the all-conquering internal combustion engine. Against this background, it’s encouraging to see that the city is investing in a light-rail tram system, but as a solution to a looming crisis, it’s a sticking plaster on an impending amputation.

Still, while the sun shines (and boy, does it shine) things have been good. The Greater Phoenix area is comprised of several distinct cities, among them the City of Phoenix itself, Tempe, Chandler and our home for the next 8 days, Scottsdale. Each of these cities has a particular character, indeed brand, and there is a pride and competition between them which makes for pleasant civic characters. The City is ringed by a main gyratory freeway, and bisected by several other penetrator routes. Navigation is easy, however the first turn from the airport may be the hardest.

That’s all down to the relevant newness of the Rental Car Centre, whose location doesn’t seem to have been picked up my lots of route information providers. The trick if heading to Scottsdale, therefore, is to retrace the route of the shuttle bus all the way back to the airport terminal and then out the other side. Look for the 44th Street Exit and head North to Camelback Road where you hang a right alongside the southern flank of Camelback Mountain.

Given the short inbound flight from Las Vegas and therefore the minimal risk of missing anything alcoholic and of quality, a hire car is definitely the way to go. A full-size from Hertz, through Amex and with #1 Club Gold Service was under £30 inclusive for a one-way 24hr hire. It’s a 25 minute drive in weekend afternoon traffic to our hotel, The Phoenician.

Holder of the AAA Five Diamond Award and repeatedly named in the Conde Nast Gold List, The Phoenician is part of Starwood’s Luxury Collection of individually branded properties. It’s considered a flagship hotel and is not only managed by Starwood, but also owned by them and Starwood’s South West Regional Office is on-property.

The hotel has a particular style, which is probably best described as late 20th Century American Luxe. The main hotel building spreads in two crescent wings either side of the lobby, with a further wing backing off the hotel at the base of Camelback Mountain. The crescent wings frame terraces which play host to bars and pools (the lower of which is mother-of-pearl lined) and which are bound at their base by an ornamental necklace lake filled with koi carp (and a turtle). An oval lawn spreads out beyond the lake and is ringed on the facing side by two-storey casitas with drive-up access, the central Centre for Well Being (spa), Fitness Centre, Funician Kids’ Club and Beauty Salon.

Between the casitas and to the left looking from the main hotel is access to the Golf Club and its cafe, and the Windows on The Green Restaurant above.

It is a popular convention hotel (a new meeting wing is slated for 2010) and also has facilities for weddings. Although there are some family-friendly facilities, such as the aforementioned Kids’ Club and waterslide, Starwood market other hotels such as the Westin Kierland and Sheraton Wild Horse Pass as more suited to younger families.

The Phoenician has a strong local following who dine there and seems also to be a favourite of college student parents visiting their young ones at Arizona State. Repeat custom appears high, evidenced by numerous overheard and participated-in conversations.

This is my second stay at The Phoenician, but the Meerkats first and I’m interested to see what they think. Last time (2007) I had actually booked and rebooked several times as different SPG promotions were launched. These are real dealmakers for me, as combinations of double/triple-points and one-off bonuses can easily bank the equivalent of 25,000 BA Miles from a 12 day stay. I settled then on a $299 tax incl B&B rate, which offered the fourth night free. Unlike some Starwood rates (eg ‘Free Nights at Resorts Worldwide/35% Off Best Available Rates), this benefit is repetitive and therefore every fourth night is comp'd.

Cruising up the hotel drive in last year’s Mustang, we presented ourselves at the gatehouse and were asked to drive not to the main hotel lobby, but instead to the Canyon Suites which occupy a separate building. A cursory glance at the web reviews for The Phoenician will elicit the knowledge that the Canyon Suites are considered the place of myth and legend – a fantastical place to which no Starwood Preferred Guest status-holder has ever been upgraded.

Well, there I was, Starwood Preferred Guest Gold (not Platinum) on a promotional rate and I was being met on the steps by one of the seven Canyon Suites Ambassadors who fulfil the combined roles of concierge, butler and receptionist. The suite was superb and, frankly, I was spoilt to the extent that I wasn’t going to take a chance with The Meerkats this year.

So, the 2008 trip beckons and I register for the SPG third quarter promotion. I want a double double room and, conveniently, this opens up a neat access route to the Canyon Suites. Each suite, you see, is separated from the next by a connecting double double bedroom. These bedrooms are furnished to exactly the same standard as the suites – they just lack the additional space and one or two features like a fax/printer and spa bath. All other Canyon Suites amenities remain available and the rooms themselves are far from small. They are also bookable separately, but seem sometimes not to appear on a general rate search. The modus operandi therefore is to seek out the 4 for 3 rate – Taste of Luxury – and then do an availability search based on that. Hey presto, $429 inclusive for 3 people.

Once again then, we present ourselves at the gatehouse and are directed to the Canyon Suites drive. On this occasion, we are met by the bellhop at the car and an Ambassador intercepts us as we walk into the lobby. As on the first visit, there are no check-in formalities since all details are held from SPG and the credit card used to guarantee the booking. We are walked to our room and shown around, the detailed tour we enjoyed (and needed) last time being declined on this second visit. We’re offered coffee which arrives moments later and gives us the opportunity to take the weight off before we finally allow ourselves to properly unpack for the first time, despite being 10 days into the trip.

The decor throughout the Canyon Suites is certainly more contemporary than the style of the main hotel, with muted beiges and greys set off by features of turquoise and pewter. Suites comprise a bedroom separated on one side from a dining area by sliding louvred doors, and on another by a traditional door to the desk/office area. Between the office and the dining area is the living area with sofa, chairs, coffee table and large plasma.

The bedroom too has a plasma screen and the bathroom leading off has a smaller LCD screen above the over-sized spa bath. The loo is in a separate room off the bathroom and there is a spacious shower cubicle.

Toiletries are a grapefruit and eucalyptus combination, branded for The Phoenician and made by Gilchrist & Soames. They are generous in proportion and make for useful gifts for maiden aunts upon return to Blighty.

At the entry to the suite there is also a guest loo and abundant storage along the passageway that leads to the connecting door to the adjacent double double. All suites and rooms have furnished balconies with a minimum of a day bed, two chairs and a table. Views are either of the pool and Camelback Mountain, or the quieter outlook of the Golf Course.

The Canyon Suites has its own separate pool, with abundant beds and also cabanas for hire (can’t see the point myself, but there you go). Each bed is provided with a couple of towels and pitchers of ice water are delivered and constantly replenished. There is free wired broadband in the rooms and free WiFi around the pool (can’t see the point.....). Signs direct you to the Canyon Grill, but this is actually something of a misnomer. All service is poolside or at your lounger/cabana, with four tables at the far end of the pool if you wish to dine at a table. The menu is reasonably extensive – American and Southwestern snacks and salads - and mirrors that offered by the pool bar in the main resort area.

Morning tea or coffee is served by your Ambassadors on a silver tray and there is a coffee and pastry station in the lobby, replaced later in the day with Iced Tea and cookies.

Come teatime, one of the hotel Sommeliers picks a couple of bottles from the million dollar cellar and treats you to a wine-tasting in the lobby with assorted canapés. It’s a great way to learn about wine in a completely sales-free environment. In fact, I’m absolutely amazed that they don’t take the opportunity to flog you some.

A couple of Mercedes R-Class are available to run guests into Scottsdale on a complimentary basis, which is useful for shopping at Fashion Square and dining around about. Should an R-Class not be available, then the in-house Execucar rank will provide a Town Car which the Canyon Suites will cover the cost of.

It’s about a 150 yard walk from the Canyon Suites to the main hotel lobby but, if heat or fatigue prove too great a barrier then a golf buggy will be summoned to buzz you down there. Likewise, if you need a lift to the spa or the golf club, then a buggy (or Mercedes) will appear.

The one facility that is arguably missing is some kind of evening bar service in the Suites lobby however – for those times when you really can’t face the busier hotel bar.

Breakfast can be taken in your room/suite, or in the hotel’s Il Terrazza Restaurant. In the restaurant, there is a choice of buffet or a la carte, with a chef manning the central station to cook egg dishes to order. Seating is indoor or out on the terrace, but the warmth even at the outset of the day – and the usual outdoor problem of the odd scavenging bird mean that air conditioned comfort is the only choice. Orange juice and coffee are the default offerings, but your server will provide other juices from a wide selection at back-of-house and also tea. Remember, this is America, so tea will not come with milk unless asked for and, unbelievably for a property of this calibre, they did run out of English Breakfast one morning. It did appear that the spread was slightly less deep than the last visit also, but this may very well have reflected the fact that the whole property was much less full than last time.

The restaurant has just emerged from a refit which, it has to be said, is not 100% successful. Although the previous design was beginning to show its age, the new version is somewhat less spacious and suffers, in particular, from the use of some very expensive but very ‘clingy’ velour. Ladies, hold on to your skirts! It’s a long way from being in any way unpleasant – just not quite perfect.

Phoenix, Arizona – Part Two

Over the years when I was travelling for work, I became more and more anaesthetised to the ‘joys’ of restaurants and nightlife and, despite my still tender years, I’ve really come to appreciate not going out all the time. Indeed, for a few years, I delighted in self-catering villa holidays and cooked myself most of the time. It’s only more recently that I’ve returned to hotels, but I apologise now that the information I can offer on bars and restaurants in the hotel and Scottsdale is limited by my continuing preference for ‘staying in’. I also find that my appetite is somewhat suppressed in the Sonoran Desert heat.

The ability to avoid going out to eat every single night is enhanced by the flexibility afforded by having a rental car for at least the 24 hours immediately following arrival at Sky Harbor. Just off East Indian School Road at Miller, for example, you’ll find a perfectly serviceable Fry’s supermarket, at which you can stock up on provisions to bring back to the hotel. The trick here is to go to the Customer Service desk first and pick up a VIP Club Loyalty Card. You’ll have to fill in the form attached (but a UK address will ensure that you never make it onto the database) and you’re good to go. You’ll then see that, for many products, there are two prices shown – one for cardholders and one for non-cardholders. The savings can be significant; look out especially for great cardholder deals on wine. You’ll have plenty of space in the cupboards back at the Canyon Suites, the fridge is a full-size one that you can push the hotel’s contents to the back of and, if you don’t want to walk through the lobby with your booty, then just forego the free valet parking and drive yourself into the underground spaces and come straight up in the lift bypassing Reception. Turndown service includes any ice you may need and, of course, you can request more at any time.

If you do intend heading out, beyond the hotel’s own eateries, then the choice is wide. There are plenty of bars and restaurants clustered around the Old Scottsdale, Waterfront and Fashion Square areas. The best of them all, without a doubt, is Mastro’s at City Hall, which is a first class steakhouse with live jazz most evenings. You can eat in the booths of the front bar area or the more traditional tables which take up the rear and largest portion of the building.



Your Ambassador will organise a table but do bear in mind that it is busy every night of the week. If you have a particular date in mind, then make use of the pre-arrival email offer which you will receive from your Ambassador, to ensure that you get your preferred time. The free limo to Fashion Square will drop you at Mastro’s, which is next door.

The service style is very New York – busy, professional with dedicated teams of servers who each have their own specific roles. The menu is extensive and identical in both bar and restaurant, but the principal word of warning is that the portions are huge, even by US standards.

MCC, the aforementioned veggie, was happy to cross the threshold of this temple of bovine cuisine, but of course the menu was hardly skewed to cater for those with a strict ‘no bones’ philosophy. There is fish, but that’s mostly a no-go in this case too. The starter and sides offer does provide a number of choices however, and this is where things can start going obesely wrong. An appetiser portion of toasted cheese ravioli proves to be the size of a large main course anywhere else. The chopped salad side is yet bigger. The single portion of fries comes in a tureen and the ‘off-menu’ (but seemingly always available) lobster mash is likewise of gargantuan proportion. The beef, filet mignon and signature bone-in filet is, frankly to die for.

When we can make no further impression in that which is placed before us, we signal to our server that the war is over and that we can take no more. Naturally, she offers the dessert card. Declining politely for fear of imminent admittance to the nearest Bariatric Ward, we accept coffee and begin the slow process of digestion.

At which point, one of the army of servers arrives with plates and cutlery, swiftly followed by another one who lays in front of us a ‘Warm Vanilla Cake’ with ice cream. As we move to (half-heartedly) suggest that there has been some mistake, our principal server glides by to advise us that this is a complimentary gift from The Canyon Suites Ambassadors. Amazingly, we find room. The bill tops out at USD250 for three including a tip, plus wine and it’s a USD15 out-of-hours ride back to the hotel with one of the limo companies who hold cars outside the restaurant.



If your desire is more to watch motorised America go by and are looking for something casual, then the outdoor terrace of The Bungalow is a decent enough place. For an all-American sports bar with good food at very good prices then head for The Yard House in Fashion Square. It’s next to Crate and Barrel and the Valet Parking Plaza. There are useful happy hour promos and there is some ‘outdoor’ space – but it is not open air. Likewise, the Kona Grill (Pacific Rim) and Z’Tejas Grill (Mexican/Southwestern) opposite the Yard House are also worth a try.



For a respite from the heat, the free limo is primarily offered as a way of getting to and from Fashion Square, which is currently being extended to include a new branch of Barney’s New York. There is already a wide selection of ‘classic’ US stores including A&F, Kenneth Cole, Express Studio etc., complimented by some more high end offerings like TUMI, GUCCI and Yves Sant Luigi. (I made the last one up – but you know what I mean).

The Biltmore Mall is a short drive away too, but not on the free limo run and, therefore, as yet unvisited.

If your tastes are more outlet than couture, then there are two options in the Greater Phoenix area – but both will realistically require a car. The bigger by far is Arizona Mills (below), which is an easy (outside of peak hour) drive around the loop freeway to a site on the Southern side of Sky Harbor in Tempe. There is a decent selection of the outlet stalwarts and, if that’s what you’re looking for, you’ll do fine there. The other, smaller, outlet is Outlets at Anthem which is North of the metro area and, at least in my experience, not so easy to find.



The selection of retailers is complimentary to Arizona Mills – you’ll find a Bose and Ralph Lauren store here but not at AM, for example – but the centre is built in ‘Hacienda Style’ so it is open air and therefore not such a good choice for a midday haven from the nuclear-powered grill in the sky.